Blatherings From The Editor

Cleaning

Most riders like to ride more than they like to clean. Cleaning is like work - you get dirty, hot and sweaty. It's a lot more fun to be on the open road with bugs in your…face shield (thought I was going to say teeth, didn't you!).

Cleaning does have some pay offs, though. At a young age, I was taught by my peers that a clean bike picked up more chicks. Kept my bike spotless! Turns out, "A clean bike is a chick magnet." is a myth. Darn it!

Keeping the hotrod clean does make it easier to work on. It's a lot easier to get a wrench on a clean bolt and then get it to turn in the right direction. Lots of buggered up nuts and bolts out there because of the grease and grunk on 'em. Where does all that grease and grunk come from? My ride doesn't leak, does it?

That's another reason to keep your scoot clean, leaks will be pretty obvious on a clean, well cared for bike. Ever walk around your motorcycle looking things over just to make sure all is in order? Try doing that with a bike covered in road scum and bug guts that date back to your pimple days. Can't see past the crud.

There are lots of different cleaners, each touting that they are the best of all the rest. Don't you believe it. Some cleaners are so strong they can do damage to paint and aluminum covers, frames and wheels. The owner's manual for my K100 specifically stated to not use S100 on the blacked-out engine and drive train, it will take the paint off and stain it. You did read your owner's manual, didn't you? I didn't.

Look out for high-pressure water - aimed at the wrong place, you can get water in bearings and, ask me how I know, your rear drive. We use water to clean everything, so why does my bike get dirty when it rains? Seems backwards, doesn't it?

When you get set to start the cleaning process, bring lots of rags. You need rags to apply the cleaner and to scrub off those burned on birds and frogs. Then you need rags to dry the beast. Finally, you need rags to apply the wax and to buff it off. Did I say you needed lots of rags? Need a few more? Check the bathroom closet. Lots of candidates for shop rags masquerading as bath towels.

I have found it takes blood, sweat and tears to really clean the scooter up properly. Blood - never fails that some sharp tie-down or bolt head will give me a nasty gash. Sweat - we live in Arizona, in the desert, it's hot! I sweat…a lot. Tears - wipe the sweat off your face with a rag you used to apply some really trick cleaner/polisher/waxer. Brings out the tears right now!

I like a clean and tidy bike. After a long ride I spend quite a bit of time cleaning and polishing. Never fails that I find some nut, bolt or plastic piece that needs a bit of attention. Cleaning the rims and checking the tires helps find that #%@&% nail in your brand new, only-five-hundred-miles-on-it tire - BTDT. Deryle and Wanda - Keeping the K Klean.

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